Human personality dynamics as bane of domestic violence among couples in Nigeria: the counselling perspective

Abstract

The aim of the paper is to have an insight into the implication of human dynamics on the increase domestic violence in our society among couples. Human dynamics is the attitudinal change inherent in an individual with difference in their personality and behaviors towards each other. Marriage is a system that requires whole deep understanding of partners’ behaviour; the diversity in their Psychosocial and physical adjustment to help in averting domestic violence among the couples. The couples involved in domestic violence or abuses are creation of Nature who are mentally, physically and emotionally different, and acting in distinct ways. The differences placate the attitude and interactive behavior towards each other. The sociological assumptions in the society gave man the control of the family and having absolute right over woman as provided by the culture of man dominance in family setting. While, the psychological assumption of domestic violence among couples relates to the personality dynamic which is the expression of emotions and feelings towards one another. The understanding needed in marriages determine the love and mutual co-existence of the couples, and when those expected values are not available; it causes doubts and suspicious that leads to home crisis. The couples are suspicious and misinterpret the verbal and non-verbal communication of the individual thoughts, feelings, pains, needs, dependence in the home causing domestic conflicts and violence. The Domestic violence has dimensional effects on the partners, the children who have negative experience from a violence home, the society experiences high rate of single parenting, high level of crimes and maladaptive behaviour in the society and total failure of the marriage institutions among other implications. The writers made recommendations and concluded that, there should be understanding of the differences or diversity in our personality dynamics, and ensure couples accept and tolerate one another.