An investigation into the trend of domestic violence on men: Re-visiting the Sepedi adage “Monna ke nku o llela teng”

Abstract

This paper brings to the fore, experiences of men who are victims of domestic violence (DV) where women are the perpetrators. According to societal laws and dictates, the man is not allowed to show his pain and agony in public. This belief further intensified by the rules of the patriarchal society that imposes the rules of masculinity on the man, for instance, a man is not supposed to cry. Hence, male victims of DV are “hard-to-reach” as they prefer to live in the closet. This study used the qualitative methodology to gather information and thematically analyse information. The study was also guided by the radical theory. The findings show that men as victims of DV are reluctant to report such cases due to the stigma attached to it by peers, law enforcement agents and by extension, the society. As the proportion of DV against men is still low when compared with that of women, the findings reveal that most women are knotted in the trap of playing victims while they are themselves, perpetrators.

Keywords: Patriarchy; Masculinity; Femininity; Domestic violence; Emasculation